Thackis

Today

Today... has been interesting.

Rough and sad in some aspects, comforting in others. The end of stuff, yet the continuation of others.

Don't really know what to think of it all. I'm sure I've made the right choices, but there is a heavy haze around everything. An obscurity of the paths ahead. What to do? Which to take? What is the right call?

My age doesn't help in this regard. I no longer have as many options to choose or the freedom to choose some.

There is an impatience in me, a desire to have something solid to guide my way, to help me to make the decisions needed for the path ahead. An impatience that no longer has any anchor nor one in sight.

Which only means that I must anchor it. A task I dread for fear of poorly choosing or rethinking the choice that I made. A fear of a life wasted. I am so flexible, so amenable, that choosing purely for myself is a challenge. I challenge which is long overdue, and partly why I've chosen this path to begin with. A challenge which I honestly have no taste for, but for which matters not.

I can only hope that whatever happens I can look back and have been happy with the choices that I make.